Searching for a pisser? Like to hear a funny that’ll make you wet yourself?
You’ve come to the right place.
Year of Living Sober isn’t just about sharing the trials, tribulations and torment of a self-inflicted self-imposed year of alcohol abstinence, it’s also about embracing an alternative, humourous approach to booze-free living.
For proof of YOLS’s ‘style’ you’ve only got to look at some of the search terms leading liquor lovers or reformed booze hounds to these pixelled pages. Search terms driving teetotaller-curious traffic towards this dipsomaniac domain include:
‘booze jokes’, ‘sober jokes’ and ‘alcohol jokes’
There are some other search terms too including: ‘bucket of hot chips’ (because I did a blog post on how a bucket of chips is like a white russian) ; ‘Shakti Gawain alcohol’ (I wonder what that tastes like?) and my personal favourite of the day, ‘Medicine to growth (sic) the penis when you are sleeping’ (don’t bother searching the blog for that magic tonic—if I discovered that I’d be sleeping in a hammock in the Bahamas somewhere by now) but a good deal of interest in YOLS comes from the funnies.
And that’s cool with me.
Here at Year of Living Sober we (I) try to make the serious issue of alcohol abuse a bit…fun. While alcoholism is a very serious issue for many, for us (me), we (I) feel it is important to have a laugh at ourselves (my drinker-self and my non-drinker self). Alcohol can cause enough suffering without anyone adding to the misery; the YOLS aim is to turn the devil drink into a source of amusement—inspiration even.
I’ve wasted plenty of time getting wasted and taking myself and the world too seriously. ‘Chill out’, they say; ‘Life’s short—enjoy it’, they say; ‘Don’t take everything so seriously’, they say.
Good advice I reckon.
So, in the spirit of spirit-sacrifice here are the 10 Funniest Alcohol and Bar Jokes Ever*
(*On this blog, since it started on 11/11/2011)
10 Funniest Alcohol and Bar Jokes Ever
1. A woman walks into a bar and asks the barman for a double entendre. So he gave her one.
2. A hunting dog walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve hunting dogs here,” and the hunting dog says, “That’s okay, I don’t drink. I’m just here to pick up a bird.”
3. A termite walks into a bar and says, “Is the bar tender here?”
4. An old-fashioned typewriter walks into a bar and says I’d like to set up a tab.
5. Q. Why does drinking too much alcohol in your teens lead to memory loss?
A. Why does drinking too much alcohol in your teens lead to memory loss?
6. Q. What do you call a daiquiri made with precisely two-and-a-half eggs?
7. A man walks into a bar and is immediately disqualified from the World Limbo Championships.
8. Q: How many binge-drinkers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four. Three to change the lightbulb and one to vomit on your shoes.
9. A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.”
10. F1, F2, F3, F4, F5, F6, F7, F8, F9, F10, F11 and F12 walk into a bar and the barman says, “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions.”
Thanks for stopping by.
POST YOLS UPDATE!!!
Since completing my year of living sober I have compiled a Little Booze Joke Book featuring the best of a list of what became over 147 Little Booze Jokes. The imaginatively titled ‘The Little Booze Joke Book’ is available to buy now (currently eBook only) and you can get a FREE sample by clicking the banner which will take you to Amazon now! Have fun.